happy memorial day everyone yaaay.

funtimes saturday....ended up goin to ross instead of the beach...bought slippers and fun underwear yaaaay....that was fun..and now im broke...oh well...ate w/ family at soup plantation....couldnt go to ray’s party boohooo....i was sad...but oh well....at least that was one saturday nite when i dint get in trouble yaaaay....

sunday....went to church...aahh friggin missed 30 minutes of it...felt so guilty...and then got home....and then got bribed into goin to camarillo...lol...well not rilly bribed..i rilly wanted to go shopping...so yaaaay bought stuff...funtimes...sue was there but she dint friggin see me...ugh loser...got home...went online of course...funfun online...i was happy..heeeheee.

monday...today...so unproductive...wut else is new...interesting convos w/ jai (oddness huh jai) ...sue (aawww sue’s growing up lol)... funtimes tonite for chelle (breathe in breathe out)...okai i need to be productive now...its 9sumtin and havent done shieet...but wutever...im happy....jus coz...life is fun if u want it to be. heehee.

wutupwutupwutupwutup...im at the ucla library rite now...tryin to do my englsih research paper...but obviously its not working...so far all ive done is read blogs and emails n shiet..yaaay im bein productive...wahahahaaaaaa no...

this week went by pretty quickly...funtimes all the time of course...thursday was fun after school...went to proyecto guadalupano to do some community service...just to make myself feel better...coz whenever i do a good deed...i feel like ive redeemed myself from my sins...LOL jk...funtimes with joy at mr. durante's car wahaa he's so adorable...after proyecto went to the spring concert...the very first concert where i came as part of the audience and not part of the choir...*sniff sniff*...i thought everyone did great....april...chelle in the schola...sue and her piece...maria, christine, christine with their dance..everyone else desy, gladys, shar, bel, len, coleen, eveerryoonee deserves a big yaaay...i dont really regret not being able to be up on the stage with everyone...thats jus becoz i got to see the big picture...and that was funtimes for me.it was also fun to see people who came just to see...u know who u guys are...funtimes at gradnite for them yaaay. after the concert me, chelle, sue, bel, shar, trina, and shar's bro went to upper house and chilled for a while. maaan that lychee boba was too sweet. none of that for me anymore.

friday: senior ditch day! dint rilly know wut i was gona do....but chelle n keith over here were too sweet and brought me breakfast...awww thanx u guyssssss...sorry i looked like shit but who wouldnt if people jus wake u up and and crash in ur house...nyahahaahaaa jk....while chelle n keith were watching titanic i got ready to go to chelle's coz francine was gona pick is up to go to eagle rock for the pictures....it was me chelle jai francine portia audrey april nikki maryrose kat jhona joanna marlene....that was fuuun....ate at in n out...got our pics...everyone else wanted to go to the beach but i couldnt coz i dint wana get in trouble anymore...so went home with jai and jus chilled...jai is the carefullest driver ever i swear...lol...good job jai...sue came..watched the game for a bit until it got rilly depressing...and then we decided to rent a movie....SERENDIPITY....best word ever...nyahaha....but yeah....fun girly nite....

saturday....today..im assuming i cant go out today jus coz i already did yesterday...i wanted to go to cathedral graduation....but no cant....congratulations to the cathedral boys though...party hard...haha no....and i wana party hard tonite at ray's but cant either...hmmmm maybe i can do sumthin bout that...hmmm...hahhaa we'll see... and rite now ive been in this library for almost two hours now...havent done shiiitttt.... and im gona be leavin soon coz my sister and her friend wana go to the beach.....wow it is a beautiful day today....aww i love it.

yes...second blog for today...heehee....im jus tryin to avoid studying for friggin physics and precal test that are coincidentally both tom. i swear, they talk about how to torture students. ggrrrrr.

but im okai....funtimes laffin of course with mariaaaa...coz i know she wants some gud lovin...she wants sommmee.......i know ur first in line maria....mari is dying to be the second one...and fine...ill be third... u guys better leave some for me okaai...LOL this is sad.....chelle if ur readin this i can jus see the reaction on ur face..waaaaahaaaaaaaa no.

newaysss my goal for the week was not to go online at all...LOL...pretty funnie and unattainable goal rite there for me...obviously....dude i seriously need to sort our my priorities...of course the internet is number 1...nyahahaaa okai mom is buggin...uggh why did they have to come baaaaccckkk...last week was the best week of my life...*sigh*...okai i need to study now. grrr.

i was happy this morning. i dunno why. no particular reason. i just was. well, iono. i guess i just realized that there are too many things that i could be so thankful for that i havent seen before. yaaay.

"The happiest people seem to be those who have no particular cause for being happy except that they are so."

- William Inge

i love my senior quote.

this weekend was fuuuuuuuuuuuun......one of the best weekends ever...just coz parents were away...and i got to play. heehee....

saturday was fun at practice i guess....instead of tita johannes, chelle had the sad face. heehee...but its all gona ge gud chelle. we’re getting better. im perty sure. so after practice we all went to joy’s party, well went to coleen’s first and then to joy’s. interesting car ride. and yes maria, three red lights.

party was cooooool everyone was jus chillen n stuff. some people had more fun than others and im happy for them...aaaw beeeel... and yeah, fun talks again with who else but mari chelle n maria. best line from maria... “this is torture!” LOL. im not gona tell every single detail that happened coz im to lazy...but yeah...funtimes i guess....funtimes all the time rite? rite.

people chilled at my house after...it was mari chelle joe joe bj keith....i wanted to have a big sleepover but everyone had to go home... suxxx...lol

sunday was church day and study day....dint work....but oh well...had a nice long nap...

weekend was yaaay i guess....parents got back tonite...sadness comes again..nyahaa...but im always sad...so nothing new there... wahaaaaaaa no.

and now im tryin to be productive but cant. im a dumbutt for being such a loser. why the hell do i have to be such a...... aayeee naaakooooo....im gona go do sumthin to keep my mind off stuff.....byebye

oh hey wait i wana do special messages too...

sue : thanx for putting up with my nonsense...and for telling me to wake up and smell the shit around me

maria: thanx for all the laffs...i seriously need all the laffs i can get...thanx for the constant support and love...u make me cry(in a good way...lol)

chelle: thanx for keeping me company in my time of need...(friday nite LOL)...and for making me realize that bestfriends do make life miserable and sucky.

THURSDAY, MAY 16

man this week is sloooooowwwwwww........oh no but wait....would i rather have a slow week, enjoying every second that i spend with my immac sisters, or a fast week where everything just goes by, *snap*, like that. i guess slow weeks are the best at this time of my life...

here are some random vocabulary words that have been buggin me for a while now...

AP TESTS
noun. definition: tests that make me feel bad about myself. i totally bummed biology. english and spanish were eeeeehhhh. but wutever. do i care? NO.

GRADUATION
long awaited event. definition: the day that everyone has been looking forward too, but yet dreading as well.

BOYS
noun. definition: people...i mean creatures...who have no clue about anything at all.

“BEST FRIENDS”
noun. definition: people who ruin everything. lol. right chelle? yesss.


SATURDAY, MAY 18

parents left on wednesday night to go to sanfran and to reno....yeeeeeesssssss...its been goin great so far...ive been sleeping at 3am...goin online forever of course....party haaaaaaard

after school yesterday, went to coffee bean w/ chelle, shar, n sue, and then to the mall to go job hunting and shoe shopping. wut else happened...gross dudes hittin on shar ..and wen they saw that shar wasnt interested..they turned to me...sadness...lol gross..we saw bel treena n tita yaaaay...and many more cute peoples

oh yesterday was funtimes w/ chelle and my oh so cool sister. nyahahahaaaaa.... i know im weaaaak godamnit! but wutever, i was still thinkin straight okai...my world was jus turnin a lil bit...i need some coffee now. chelle went home at...iono...hmmm....almost 2 i think...im not sure...and so i went online ...talked to some peole....and im perty sure i was makin sense...i think...i hope so.

woke up at 930 this mornin...wow...funtimes doin laundry with sister this mornin...its rilly sad but this is the first time ive done landry here all by myself, and i think it turned out pretty good. we’ll see if my red sweater did some major damage later when i check it...

so in conclusion, lol, i can totally survive without my parents around here. i mean yeah we dont have food and we’re starving to death over here, but who cares when we’re two happy daughters... lol.... who wants to party hard tonite? i do!

SUNDAY

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY! i think today will be a very tiring day for me, coz we have visitors from the pi and we had to cook n entertain n stuff...funtimes with little kids....i just hope i can get some work done tonite. i havent done shit and im thinking if i shuld go to school tom...should i?...we’ll see.

okai i ended up goin to the mall and i went on another one of my impulsive shopping sprees. damnit im broke and i rilly need to get a job soon. i havent done shit, i have to go to mass later tonite, and therefore there is no sleeping for cress tonite.

FRIDAY (okai yeah im not goin in order...oh well wutever)

went to the mall then marketplace with chelle, bel, and keith. we watched spiderman with lemme see.....tina, carol, carol’s sister, keith, keith’s friends, ray, aprille, and rj. its all in chelle’s blog if u want details..nyahaha...i jus wana thank keith for driving me home in his cool car. i think i got in trouble. i couldnt rilly tell coz my mom wasnt talkin to me when i got home. wutever. she finally talked to me when she needed something tho..nyahaha .....neways i dont remember wut else happened...all i know wa si was
tired...and wut else...yeah jus look at chelle’s blog...neways....before i forget...it’s someone’s birthday today...happy birthday! =/.

SATURDAY

had to wake up early to take my subject a test...it was ehh...we’ll see when i get my scores. bel, shar, christine, and joe were also there. funtimes? funtimes. mom picked me up..went to costco...and then saw this dude that i used to have a crush on...iono wut the hell i was thinking then...but wutever. then went home and took a nice nap before goin to practice. woke up, chelle calls to say im late coz theyre starting at exactly 4 (wow amazing). practice was uhmm...a major workout for me...along with the bball and stuff....yaay. i wasnt feeling that good during practice, i tried to hide it, and i guess it worked. iono. but of course my cool fartnah was jus makin me laff with his cool peter parker-ness...nyahaha...thanx cool fartnah.

then we went to ihop after...there was aprille, cool fartner, me, chelle, keith, naomi, mari, dj, diane, and bj. aww that was fun. mari tried to start the question game but thank god it dint happen...nyahahaa jk...neways we should do that more often u guys. we only have a few more weeks to go before all of this is over. so sad yet so true.

i got home at around 1130? i think. bj took me home, and i dont think i got in trouble. haha i rilly duno. i jus tried to be a good daughter and helped in the kitchen (coz they were preparing for the visistors the next day), so yeah. i was sooooo tired but i still dint want to sleep. i was jus watchin tv, thinking about stuff, listenin to music, and writing stuff. i think i finally went to sleep at around 2:45 or sumthin....too tired n drained.. physically and emotionally.


SO NEWAYS, ive been very disappointed about myself lately. ive been majorly slacking off like never before. my ap bio test is on tuesday and i havent touched any of my bio crap at all...i guess there’s jus too many distractions that arent even worth bothering about. damn them distractions.

song that fits my mood rite now...

The Warrior is a Child by Gary Valenciano


Lately I've been winning battles left and right
But even winners can get wounded in the fight
People say that I'm amazing
Strong beyond my years
But they don't see inside of me
I'm hiding all the tears

(Chorus)

They don't know that I go running home when I fall down
They don't know who picks me up when no one is around
I drop my sword and cry for just a while
'Cause deep inside this armour
The warrior is a child

Unafraid because his armour is the best
But even soldiers need a quiet place to rest
People say that I'm amazing
Never face retreat
But they don't see the enemies
That lay me at His feet

Chorus x2

I drop my sword and look up for His smile
Because deep inside this armour
Deep inside this armour
Deep inside this armour
The warrior is a child.

i stopped to think about how many weeks are left in school. it saddens me to know that there arent that many left. i thought about all four years i spent in immac, all the friendships that ive made, the laughter, the tears?, the inside jokes, even all the procrastination that was maybe part of the fun of high school, and who can forget all the bonding and funtimes.

freshman year, i started at immac as a scared little girl, dreading going to my classes for the fear of being different from everyone else, hoping each and everyday that my high school life would be over. but now, my senior year, i constantly find myself hoping that high school would never end. after all the bonds that i have made, it is just too hard for me to leave now.

neways...

THIS WAS THE BLOG I SAVED BEFORE DEBUT PRACTICE....
i realized that this time, in my life right now, is a time for me to be happy and appreciate all the things that im blessed with. why should i waste my time depressing myself and thinking about how sad life would be for me? i have all the time to do that in the future. right now, i realized that if i do set my mind to something, it would happen. rite? rite. =).


THIS WAS THE BLOG I WROTE AFTER DEBUT PRACTICE AND AFTER TODAY’S STARBUCKS MOMENT AT THE HOUSE OF PIES....
damnit life sux. i thought i could just be happy and smile and jus laugh. i guess not. im not that strong yet i guess. i mean i know i cant have a perfect life, with everything going my way. maybe i think too much. iono...whenever something good happens to me, i always think that something bad will happen. i am a strong believer of karma...good or bad....iono why but i just am. ugh wutever. ima shuttup now.

neways..................

man...i do not even know why im in ap english....i just have no clue at all...iono if im even gona pass it and im serious...but wutever..if i fail...then let it be so...like i care..well actually i do...but it doesnt matter now..coz its over...one down...two to go.

funtimes at house of pies with chelle, maria, and mari though. all i can say is....maaaan that was very hard for me...it rilly was.... but thanx for the laughter and all that...nyahahahaa.

This is a forward that i thought was interesting....

The One that Hurts Most

Have you ever wondered which hurts the most; saying something and wishing you had not, or saying nothing and wishing you had? I guess the most important things are the hardest things to say. Don't be afraid to tell someone you love them. If you do, they might break yourheart... but if you don't, you might break theirs.

Have you ever decided not to become a couple because you were so afraid of losing what you already had with that person? Your heart decides whom it likes and whom it doesn't. You can't tell your heart what to do. It does it on its own.... when you least suspect it, or even when you don't want it to.

Have you ever wanted to love someone with everything you had, but that other person was too afraid to let you? Too many of us stay walled because we are too afraid to care too much...for fear that the other person does not care as much, or at all.

Have you ever denied your feelings for someone because your fear of rejection was too hard to handle? We tell lies when we are afraid.... afraid of what we don't know, afraid of what others will think, afraid of what will be found out about us. But every time we tell a lie.... the thing we fear grows stronger. Life is all about risks and it requires you to jump. Don't be a person who has to look back and wonder what they would have, or could have had.

No one waits forever.


Another forward from someone...

Many people are afraid of growing old.
I'm afraid ofgrowing old and boring.
Many people are afraid of growing old, alone.
I'm afraid of growing old insane.
Many people are afraid of losing their looks.
I'm afraid of losing my dreams.
Many people are afraid of losing their youth.
I'm afraid of losing my soul.
When you're 15, 35 seems ancient.
When you're 35, 15 seems juvenile.
A turnaround in a split second --
two decades zoom past and before you know it,
it's only a mile to the next millennium.
Don't fear age -- it's a rite of personhood.
Don't fear death -- it's God's greatest jest.
Don't grow old -- you don't have to.
Don't date because you're desperate.
Don't marry because you're miserable.
Don't have kids because you think your genes are superior.
Don't separate because you think it's fashionable.
Don't drink because you have troubles.
Don't gamble because you think winning is inevitable.
Don't philander because you think you're irresistible.
Most likely, you're not.
Don't associate with people you can't trust.
Don't cheat.
Don't lie.
Don't pretend.
Don't try to buy your way into the kingdom of God.
Don't dictate because you're smarter.
Don't demand because you're stronger.
Don't sleep around because you think you're old enough and know
better.
Don't hurt your kids because loving them is harder.
Don't sell your self, your family or your ideals.
Don't stagnate.
Don't regress.
Learn a new skill.
Find a new friend.
Start a new career.
Don't live in the past.
Time can't bring anything or anyone back.
Don't put your life on hold for possibly Mr. Right.
Don't throw you life away on absolutely Mr. Wrong
because your biological clock is ticking and you can't afford
to have your
eggs harvested before the new millennium.
There's always a mad rush to something,
somewhere but victory does not always belong to those who finish
first.
Sometimes, there is no race to be won,
only a price to be paid for some of life's more hasty decisions.
To terminate your loneliness, reach out to the homeless.
To feed your nurturing instincts, care for the needy.
To fulfill your parenting fantasies, get a puppy.
Don't bring another life into this world for all the wrong reasons.
To keep yourself warm, buy a jacket.
In the long run, it will be less complicated and costly.
To make yourself happy, pursue your passions and be the best
you can be.
Simplify your life.
Take away the clutter.
Get rid of destructive elements: abusive friends,
nasty habits
and dangerous liaisons.
Don't abandon your responsibilities but don't
overdose on duty.
Don't live life recklessly without thought and
feeling for your family.
Be true to yourself.
Don't commit when you're not ready.
Don't keep others waiting needlessly.
Fall in love -- it's the greatest thing on earth.
But take care. And remember, after the fall must come the rise.
Go on that trip.
Don't postpone it.
Say those words.
Don't let the moment pass.
Do what you must even at society's scorn.
Write poetry.
Love deeply.
Walk barefoot.
Hold hands.
Dance with wild abandon.
Cry at the movies.
Take care of yourself.
Don't wait for someone to take care of you.
You light up your life.
You drive yourself to your destination.
No one completes you... except you.
It is true that life doesn't get easier with age.
It only gets more challenging.
Don't be afraid.
Don't lose your capacity to love.
Pursue your passions. Live your dreams.
Don't lose faith in God.
Don't grow old.....

Just grow up.


This is another forward that i thought was interesting....

The One that Hurts Most

Have you ever wondered which hurts the most; saying something and wishing you had not, or saying nothing and wishing you had? I guess the most important things are the hardest things to say. Don't be afraid to tell someone you love them. If you do, they might break yourheart... but if you don't, you might break theirs.

Have you ever decided not to become a couple because you were so afraid of losing what you already had with that person? Your heart decides whom it likes and whom it doesn't. You can't tell your heart what to do. It does it on its own.... when you least suspect it, or even when you don't want it to.

Have you ever wanted to love someone with everything you had, but that other person was too afraid to let you? Too many of us stay walled because we are too afraid to care too much...for fear that the other person does not care as much, or at all.

Have you ever denied your feelings for someone because your fear of rejection was too hard to handle? We tell lies when we are afraid.... afraid of what we don't know, afraid of what others will think, afraid of what will be found out about us. But every time we tell a lie.... the thing we fear grows stronger. Life is all about risks and it requires you to jump. Don't be a person who has to look back and wonder what they would have, or could have had.

No one waits forever.

Take the What High School
Stereotype Are You? quiz, by Angel.